Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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