i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
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