i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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