If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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