I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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