i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Randomize
