You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Randomize
