he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
He had one of those small greek statue penises
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Randomize
