Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
