from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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