i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
