Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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