whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Randomize
