Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
