BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Randomize
