Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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