Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
