please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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