remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Randomize
