have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
