I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
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