I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
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