she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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