are you still at the devil's house?
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Randomize
