Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
My vagina just recognized that song.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
Is it penis luge time yet?
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
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