no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
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