Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize
