I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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