Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize