i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Randomize
