STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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