Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Randomize
