: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
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