She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Randomize
