That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
