And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
