just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
