A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
worst night to have a conscience
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
You're a waste of cheezeits
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Randomize
