it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Randomize
