I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize
