Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Randomize
