I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
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