Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize
