You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
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