It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
Randomize