Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
