Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Randomize
