my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
