i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Be still, my beating vagina.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Randomize
