I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
