oh god the rape fog is back!
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
