It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Randomize